Happy Anniversary, Us - Part III

Three years ago today, I married my best friend.

You'd think tickling his feet has gotten old by now, but it hasn't.

This year has been a wild ride. Danny worked overtime hours while completing a master's degree. I published and promoted one book while writing 92,000 of the most difficult words I've ever written.

Danny celebrated with me when my first book arrived, and a few days later, when a whole box of books followed. He made me laugh at the cover of the Large Print Edition, came to every book signing and event, helped set up and take down the books, poster, postcards, and punch bowl full of chocolates.

He was very, very angry when he read my worst book review. He beamed over my Publishers Weekly and Booklist reviews.

I got to go to Vermont with Danny and watch as he gained the respect of his classmates and professors during his masters residency. I pinned his masters hood in place, and saw him shake the dean's hand as he received his diploma.

I like the quiet moments best, though. Tea on Saturday mornings. Walks we take, hand in hand. Sitting on the couch, reading books with the windows open.

I like the funny bits that have become our own - the way grass makes us laugh, the way Danny eats cheese, the way I giggle over the phrase some say.

I like how Danny brings adventure into my life in ways I never thought would happen.

It hasn't been an easy year, but it's been a good one. I can't imagine what the next will hold.

Writing lessons from Eclipse

Writing Lessons Inspired by the Undead and the Furry:

1.) Show, Don't Tell.

Yeah, Jacob says he's in love with Bella. We heard him. Several times, actually, the kid was a broken record. (And honestly, saying you'll love someone until their heart stops beating is...awkward.) But...how does he show it? Actively show it, not just repeat it over and over while inserting insults regarding her boyfriend?

Aside from a bracelet with a wolf charm, there's not much evidence. Dude, buy a vowel. Maybe the reason she's with him and not you is because you won't stop yapping about how you're right and he's wrong. Just saying.

2.) Unless your villain is really, really, interesting, we don't need to spend much time with him/her.

Pretty much, unless your villain is whomever Christophe Waltz is playing or Cruella DeVille - i.e., really, really interesting. 

...just assume we're not all that emotionally or intellectually invested in this person. Sure, we respect that he/she needs to be there as a plot device, but given the choice we'd rather be hanging out with the main characters than with the army of baby vampires and their problems that mean less to us than what Alice picks to wear on any given occasion.

3. Be aware of your pacing.

Pretty much, you want lots of rising action, no matter what genre you're writing in. And when you reach your climax, the amount of time you spend in it should be directly proportionate to the amount of time you've spent building it up. So, if (for instance) you've been having issues with a certain redhead for three books/film installations, maybe dispatching her three minutes after she and the protagonist share the same screen is a bit quick. Just a little.

4. Establish your universe perimeters early and stick to them.

I may be missing something, but I don't remember Jasper having a southern accent in either of the two previous films. I don't remember references to a drawl in any of the books. But suddenly, he's so southern he sounds like he's auditioning for a role in True Blood.

Also - when Vampires die they shatter? I don't remember this. Did this happen earlier? Do they splinter? Are there shards?

Are they extra-flammable? Because Victoria seemed to catch fire real quick. The whole thing reminded me a little of the second Hellboy film, the way the Elves turned to ivory or alabaster or something after they died (I couldn't tell which, but it looked cool).

That's what I thought about when I watched Eclipse. What did you think?

Christians, Spec-Fic, and the Amish Issue

A good friend of mine sent me this link the other day, about why there isn't more Christian Speculative Fiction on the market, and why the Amish seem to be taking over the world.

Well, Christian bookstores, at least.

I thought it would be fun to blog about.

So let's take a look.

1.) Christian Bookstores don't carry much spec-fic/sci-fi/fantasy.

Sure, we know that the bookstores skew towards a female, and often older, demographic (hence the Precious Moments population). We know that spec-fic readers tend to be male. The two don't meet well. But even if you could get the spec-fic reading men into the bookstores, past the Testamints, and into the bookshelves, you still have a person standing in your way.

The person who buys the store's stock.

We're in a recession. We have been for a while. Though there are sure-bet spec-fic authors like Frank Peretti and Ted Dekker, stores are going to be less likely to pick up books by lesser known authors in a genre that doesn't sell much.

And it's not just Christian bookstores. Mainstreams booksellers such as Barnes & Noble and Wal-Mart are going to buy what they think will sell well in their stores.

2.) "Everyone" is asking for more Spec-fic, though.

Keep in mind that, yes, spec-fic readers are very vocal, but one more thing - they know how to use their computers (this is not necessarily true of Amish Fiction readers. Just sayin'). Mike Duran's inside source (and if my hunch regarding the identity of that source is right, is a solid person to listen to) made the point that if Spec-fic really truly sold like gangbusters, publishers and book store buyers would sit up and pay attention. Really. But they're not. So my guess is that "everyone" isn't as many people as you'd think.

3.) Frank Peretti and Ted Dekker are the big fish in the spec-fic world.

True. BUT there are tons of other writers out there. Bill Myers is one of them; he'll also be keynoting this summer at the Oregon Christian Writers Conference in Canby. Jill Williamson's By Darkness Hid was not only Marcher Lord Press's biggest seller, but won the 2010 Christy Award in their Visionary category. Randy Ingermanson has several books out, Eric Wilson did a Vampire trilogy with Thomas Nelson Publishers, Stephen Lawhead released several fantasy books. The books are out there. You might have to order them, but they are in existence.

That said...

I have to be honest here. My husband has read a lot of spec-fic of the Michael Crighton, James Rollins, Matthew Reilly, Clive Cussler type. (By the way, how much should Clive Cussler be on Dancing With the Stars? Tons, that's how much. He can drive to the lot in his pink car. Sorry. Tangent.) He's also read some of the Christian releases.

And honestly? He usually likes the general market ones better.

There have been some exceptions, but he prefers the plotting in the general market releases. And rather than ignore the elephant in the room, I'm going to go out on a limb here, and accept that I may receive angry letters - there is some really, really good Christian Fiction out there, of many genres. But some of it is not so great. Just because a book is written from a Christian world-view doesn't mean that it's a worthy piece of art or entertainment. I'm sorry. it doesn't.

So. There you have it. I'm not pointing fingers or naming names, I'm just putting it out there.

4.) Historical Romance and Amish are what's selling.

The economy is bad. CBA readers, by and large, are looking for love stories, and they want them in long skirts. Gloves optional. Why Amish? Because it's safe. Because it's cozy. Because their world is simplified. Because our world isn't. Our world is scary and war-ridden and filled with gray areas that are difficult to wade through.

Also,the rest of us look impossibly hip next to the Amish. There are loads of reasons. I did find out recently that the Amish boom is plateauing, at least. Most publishing houses have filled their Amish Writer Quotas, and in an industry where platform is the new black, that means that either you're already in, or you get to do something else. A new sub-genre will get its turn in the spotlight shortly. In the past we've seen Chick-Lit, suspense, and Prairie Fiction do really well. We'll see what comes next.

5.) The popularity of Amish Fiction represents a Christian world-view shift.

This is an interesting idea. In this blog, Mike Duran posits (sorry, watching lots of Fringe these days) that Christians are veering away from material that contains elements of the supernatural, that they avoid the mysterious. Duran argues that the Bible, what with the fish taxi and the speaking snake (oh, and the speaking mule), and the angels and the prince of the air and the curses and the locusts and the food appearing on the ground and the visions and the prophecies food multiplying and the dead being raised (reanimation? Sorry, like I said, watching Fringe) and the RESURRECTION, scripture alone includes a lot of weird. We won't even talk about end-times prophecy.

My theory on the subject is that Christians, by and large, like their spiritually-oriented paranormal material to be served straight-up. By that, I mean they want it to stay within the covers of their Bible. Because outside of that, you've got a lot of tricky theological decisions about what kinds of weird are okay, and which are twisting spiritual truths incorrectly and not okay, or downright occultic.

It's true, though, that many believers like to skip over the weirder passages of Scripture. Other believers prefer to believe a lot of the stranger bits are literary devices. We live is a post-modern world that clings to science and reason and avoids or negates the inexplicable. To think that post-modernism hasn't crept into the church is unrealistic.

Now, to say that non-paranormal stories are bland and avoid mystery is unfair. To quote Proverbs 30:18-19, "There are three things that are too amazing for me, four that I do not understand: the way of an eagle in the sky, the way of a snake on a rock, the way of a ship on the high seas, and the way of a man with a maiden." Life is mysterious. Romance is mysterious.

There's a lot of thoughts there, not necessarily a lot of conclusions.

What do you think?

Spies and Shower Tools

It's not like I'm stuck on the Russian Spy issue...except that I am, and it just keeps getting better. My mom pointed out to me this afternoon that the article I read yesterday (and included in the blog post earlier) and the one in the newspaper were not the same, and the second included a wonderful quote.

"Jessie Gugigi, 15, said she could not believe the charges, especially against Cynthia Murphy, who was an accomplished gardener.

'They couldn't have been spies,' Gugigi said. 'Look what she did with the hydrangeas.'"

The second bit of happiness for the day was the discovery of this at Target.

Some call it a loofah. Others - a "Shower Tool." I call it "marketing." What do you think?

Russian Spies, Conservative Baptists, and John Corbett

So, yesterday news broke that ten people had been arrested as Russian agents. If you want something to take the edge off your Monday morning, that's it.

I mean, I had no idea how depressing current news had been until this story broke. Life without Russian spies - bleak. Very bleak.

To make things even more fun, today we find out that some of the alleged agents had Facebook pages! True, that may not have been the purpose of the article - it's not my fault they buried the true lead.

Who knows. There could be a Russian agent in your friend list. This is the best week ever.

In other news, I spent some time mulling after my last post over why the presence of John Corbett gives me an overall sense of well-being. I got it figured out. Having spent my youth in a Conservative Baptist church back in the eighties, I saw many images of, what I like to refer to, as "Classic Jesus."

One of the side-effects of this is that I (and others like me) have been conditioned to trust and feel a general sense of well-being around lightly tanned men with shoulder-length light brown hair.

Such as John Corbett.

Case solved.

Back from Hiatus

I know. I'm sorry. It's been a month.

But I have pictures!

Look at Danny, he's all cute and graduated! After a week of residency, presenting his project and hearing about others, they handed him a diploma, one with his name on it and everything.

After that, we drove through seven states to see this:

It's the National Cathedral, and it's breathtaking.

After a whirlwind trip through DC, we went to Roanoke, Va, before backtracking to Monticello, before driving to Pfafftown, NC, before driving to Spartanburg, SC to see this:

A BMW Airplane engine at the BMW museum, which is adjacent to where they keep the big giant robots.

I'm very sorry that I don't have big giant robot pictures to post. Truly. They took my camera(s). Just know that they were huge, they twirled pieces of BMW X5 undercarriage like a q-tip, and sparks flew when they welded the pieces together.

I came to two conclusions very quickly:

1. If there was a tornado, the BMW factory is not where you'd want to be.

2. If the robots suddenly developed independent wills, these are the ones that would take over the world.

In other news...

1. Simply Sara is 100% done, edits, galleys, acknowledgements, discussion questions, dedication, back cover copy, author bio and all.

2. Danny's hooding ceremony was the night of the Glee finale, but we got to watch it a week later when we had access to reliable internet again. Oh. My. Goodness. It ended just right, I loved "To Sir, With Love,"and I can't wait till next season. Congrats to their writing team for landing the plane! I just hope we see more of Idina Menzel...

3. I picked up Elizabeth Aston's Writing Jane Austen from the library today. It looks like fun.

4. I discovered this in North Carolina -

It's a chocolate-dipped waffle bowl. An innovative concept if I've ever seen one. While it is messy to eat, it does eliminate the drip-through-the-bottom problem.

Well, the bowl at the bottom does that. But it's the functionality of the bowl with the deliciousness (and carbs) of the cone. So everyone wins, if you're willing to get your fingers chocolately.

There are worse things.

5. It's funny being back. When we left, the kids were still in school and it was dark and drizzly. Now school's out and the skies are blue and sunny. I'm not complaining, just stating that it's weird. We were only gone two weeks, but it feels more like a month!

6. We have groceries again, though. My new favorite thing that I discovered at an airport Starbucks, and I don't remember which, is Greek Yogurt. It is thick, creamy, rich in taste while being the same calorie count as fat free Nancy's (if you don't have Nancy's yogurt in your neck of the woods, it's the local premium organic yogurt).

I think I need to go stretch my legs soon, so more later. I promise it won't be a month later! I've got a pizza I need, desperately, to recreate, so if there's success, there will be a recipe to follow...