The Toast: A Nostalgia Tour

Founders Mallory Ortberg and Nicole Cliffe announced today that they're shuttering The Toast on July 1st.

I get it. I understand all of the reasoning, motivations. I understand the practicalities, I understand being creatively exhausted. Still? I'm heartbroken. The Toast featured some of the very best humor writing on the internet alongside think-pieces on faith, gender, and race. Also: Ayn Rand.

The good news is that the posts will remain online until the heat-death of the universe (their words), which means that you'll be able to mine the goodness forever.

So if you're new to The Toast, or want reminders of brighter days, here are some of my own favorites, in no particular order:



Alternatives to Writing Your Thesis

This could also have been titled "Alternatives to writing your book," and it is on-point.


All the Comments on Every Recipe Blog

THIS IS A TRUE THING.


How to Tell if You're in a Jane Austen Novel

Not the first in the series, but the first to go viral, and also the one that best shows that the comments - THE COMMENTS - on Toast boards are the best on the internet. That's probably one of the things I'm saddest to lose - the reminder that there is a place on the internet where  the faceless commenters are completely awesome. It also inspired this piece of joy from Rachel McMillan.


Men Who Have Finally 'Found Their Song' in Western Art History

This whole series is amazing, and I picked this one because, I don't know, it makes me think of That Thing You Do and that's never bad. Honestly, you'll experience museums differently after this. You'll start narrating paintings. It's awesome.


Two Medieval Monks Invent Art

Really, you guys. We've come a long way.


How I Pray

A beautiful, irreverent, and personal look at prayer from Nicole Cliffe.


The Convert Series: Leah Libresco

Mallory Ortberg interviews Leah Libresco about her conversion from atheism to Catholicism. It's a fascinating look at how and why people come to faith (and if you follow the series, all kinds of faith) as adults.

Loco Parentis: You Pretty Much Get It

This struck a chord with me, and a tour through the comments show that I'm not alone. New parent Aubrey Hirsch writes about her experience as a new parent, affirming those without children, sharing that having a child did not, in fact, rewrite her love experience. That people without children are still loving, whole beings. Lots of infertile women showed up to support each other and receive support in the comments. Aaaaannd now I'm getting teary all over again.


If Stanley Tucci Were Your Boyfriend

Probably the best in the "If X were your Y" series; but then, I really, really love Stanley Tucci.


Texts from the Dashwoods

If you haven't picked up Mallory Ortberg's Texts from Jane Eyre, you are missing out in a real and visceral way. Seriously. FOMO was inspired in response to that book. My mother may have stolen my copy (but then, I've moved so many times that the location of any of my books at any given time is a mystery. But that also means it's best time to steal a book, right?)


I Am Visiting Nicole Today And By The End of The Weekend Sansa Will Be Mine

Toast writer Jaya Saxena shares her devious plan to win the affections of Nicole Cliffe's puppy, Sansa. Be forewarned, having read this I have precautions in place to protect Shiloh and Sylvie. Speaking of dogs, here are Hamilton Lyrics To Sing To Your Dog.


Seriously. there is so much. There's a recipe for Chocolate, Cinnamon, and Pecan Babka that is a thing that I need. There's a list of Owl Faces, In Order. There are valid notes on those Bleach Commercials. It's an embarrassment of riches, and it will be missed.